I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
