it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
