Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
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"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
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Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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