I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
