my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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