It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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