sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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