covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Randomize
