So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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