Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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