I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize