operation have a gay friend backfired
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
