Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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