mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I just saw a hot homeless man
Is it because I queefed?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
