im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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