So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You ruined the universe
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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