hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing