ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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