My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize