I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
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