so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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