i don't plan on having that self control this summer
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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