I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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