i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
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stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
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Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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