Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
