No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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