Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
