Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
