I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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