D3 body, D1 cock
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
