If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I have fence marks all over my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I supernannyed him into submission
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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