You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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