I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
