Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
