You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
