We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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