Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
