I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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