Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize