I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
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JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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