doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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