She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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