.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
