can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
