Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
