she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
