Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I skipped work to stalk him.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
