I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
