Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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