god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
27 Hairstyles That Always Come With A Matching Personality
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots